I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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