i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
