He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
