STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
