My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
