I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
