This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
