I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
