I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
