I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
