Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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