Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
