Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
