It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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