spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
