Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
