What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
