So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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