Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
