she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
