Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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