So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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