Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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