im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you would pick up someone in the library
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
