I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
