How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Vodka?
Forever.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
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