Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Randomize
