I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We just shotgunned beers for America
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Randomize
