whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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