After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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