FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize