Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
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