i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
