Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Let's paint friendship bongs
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
