You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I would ride that face into the sunset
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
