I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I came so hard my ears popped.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
