I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
