Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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