I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
