Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Just invented taco cereal.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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