he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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