I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Shame - the story of my life.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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