yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
