I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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