He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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