You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
