And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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