remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
