I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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