Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
