there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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